1 /5 Dustin Doyle: The spiritual and physical abuse that happens at this church is real but deeply hidden through fear, guilt and manipulation. You’re indoctrinated that to disagree with the pastors’ views or go against their rules is akin to rejecting God, and members have been on “church discipline” (which essentially means NO church members are to have contact with you) for doing so. They emphasis the headship of men and the inferiority of women, and actively work to conceal or minimize any truths that might oppose either of these stances. Only the men are allowed to vote on issues affecting the church, but the pastors’ word trumps all. Bottom line, you are either with them or against them. The grace and mercy they preach is reserved for those inside their circle of membership, and weakly offered to those who need it most. God is love, but you won’t find it here in any genuine way, at least from the leadership.
How am I qualified to say this? I went to the church for 15 years. I graduated from their school. I saw it all first hand. My aunt once brought her Christian boyfriend to visit and another member told him that, because his hair was dyed bright red, he couldn’t be a real Christian. My grandma was placed on church discipline because she married a man who’d been divorced. I had friends expelled from school for “fadish” haircuts and being physical with their boyfriend or girlfriend. Yet the pastor’s son was getting physical with his girlfriend, and the first pornographic movie I ever saw was rented by him and viewed at his home. It’s just the circle of hypocrisy and the sad reality of living in constant fear of spiritual condemnation stemming from abusive religious leaders.
I loved so many of the people I met there and think about them often. Some members were loving and had hearts in the right place. But the spiritual abuse I experienced as a whole was massive and is something I continue to deal with to this day.
